one of Jesus’s friends, and one of a group of women who looked after him (thereby proving the rumour that behind every successful man there is at least one woman propping him up). 

One of the witnesses to the crucifixtion and entombment and one of the first witnesses to the resurrection, being one of the group who took scented oil to embalm the body on Easter Sunday and found the body not there.

St Luke writes that she had had ‘seven demons’ come out of her. 

All other rumours about her, are, it turns out, completely unfounded, and caused by popes, and other people, identifying different little-mentioned people as one and the same.

Hooray for: smelly oils, and women, who do all the running around after men.