Another mayonnaise variation, with extra mustard, lemon juice at the beginning with the egg yolk, sunflower oil for mild flavour, and chopped up dill in the end. I serve it with posh smoked salmon for lunch; it is quite tasty, and even Sam likes it.
This is a poem to be found in Lancashire Miscellany. There are two books by that name on amazon; it’s the one with the poems in it.
It is written by a guy called Sam Fitton, died 1923.
It is called Th’ Childer’s Holiday and you need to read it in a broad Lanky dialect accent.
Eh dear, I’m welly off my chump!
I scrub an’ wesh, an’ darn;
Eawr childer han a holiday,
An’ th’ heawse is like a barn.
Yo’ talk abeawt a home sweet home!
My peace is flown away;
I have to live i’ Bedlam for
A fortnit an’ a day.
They’re in an’ eawt fro morn to neet,
I met weel look so seawer;
They’re wantin’ pennies every day
An’ butties every heawer.
They’n worn my Sunday carpet eawt
Wi’ runnin’ up an’ deawn;
Eawr Polly broke a jug today,
An’ Jimmy broke his creawn.
They’n nobbut bin a-whoam a week,
But, bless me, heaw they grow;
An’ talk o’ childish innocence,
The devil’s in ’em o.
They’n smashed a brand new dolly tub,
An’ o’ my clooas pegs;
They’n rattled th’ paint off th’ parlour door,
An’ the’ skin off th’ table legs.
They started pooin’ the pictures deawn,
One neet when I were eawt,
Eawr Tum geet the’ "Rock of Ages," an’
He gave eawr Joe a clout.
Eawr Bill, who has a biggish meawth—
He’s allus in disgrace—
Set off cowfin t’other day,
An’ went reet black i’ th’ face.
He’d swallowed th’ babby’s dummy-tit
Wi-rawnging wi’ eawr Bet;
We’n gan him tons of physic, but
We hanno fun it yet.
Eawr Jack’s a plester on his nose,
An’ th’ beggar looks a treat;
He’d pood his tongue eawt to a lad
Who lives i’ Stoney-street.
Eawr Bobby’s bin i’ bed o day,
Poor lad, he does look hurt.
He went o bathin’ yesterday,
An’ some’dy stole his shirt.
They’re o so full o dirt an’ grime,
I’st never get ’em clen;
I’st ha’ to scrape ’em when it’s time
To go to schoo’ again.
Eawr Tommy says he winno goo,
That lad’s a wary wight.
He’s had his thumb i’ th’ mangle, an’
He swears he conno write.
I sat me deawn o’ Wednesday neet,
An’ th’ parson’s wife were theer,
I hope hoo didno yer me swear—
They’d put a pin i’ th’ cheear.
I’d lock ’em up i’ th’ schoo’ for good
If I could ha’ my will;
I’d see they had another clause
I’ th’ Education Bill.
I’ve clouted ’em an’ slapped ’em till
My honds an’ arms are sore;
I’st fancy I’m i’ Paradise
When th’ holidays are o’er.
They’re like a lot of lunatics,
They’n getten eawt of hond;
But yet, I wouldno part wi’ ’em
For o there is i’ th’ lond.
There is something wrong with the cat, but I only get an afternoon appointment. Still, we’re due for a quiet day in. The children start with Hama beads, which is good, as I have a pile of ironing to tackle. After lunch, I get the paints out. Then there is time for a game or two before taking the cat to the vet. After that, we reward our patience by visiting the sweetshop on the way home, and buy some chicken from the butcher, to make chicken fajitas (from a packet).
The sun is shining; it’s a lovely warm day. Definitely a paddling pool day. Which is good, because I can switch the computer on; I have an index to edit. I can print out some pictures for Hannah to colour while I’m at it.
Also, we want to do lots of cooking. Today, we decide to make carrot cakes. And Sam wants to help make dinner (spaghetti with tomatoes and tuna).
Then there is Sam’s leftover homework ( a bible story about showing friendship to unpopular people, so I pick the story of little Zaccheus up a tree)
Hannah’s viola (flying pizzicato)
Sam’s cello (with his eyes shut!)
Sam’s cello project for his cub badge (we talk about why Sam likes the cello, and why he picked it out as the instrument he wanted to play)
And I add Hannah’s Chile badge – she got a badge in the Rainbows where she was supposed to do stuff related to Chile, but all she did (other than read a book and play in the park, which don’t really count) was colour the flag and discover that they speak Spanish. We can do more than that. So today we look up Chile in the Atlas, and on the Globe, and consider what its climate might be like.
Housework: I really would like to do more, but it’s not working out. Still, at least I remember to look in my coat pockets for hankies when I put the children’s bedding in the wash.
I’m quite good at looking anywhere I can for things to do in the holidays. The church newsletter announces that church cleaning is this morning and everybody is welcome. Sam is quite domestically minded, and cleaning up somewhere else is more fun than cleaning your own mess (which our house does need it). So we take a feather duster for church, and muck in. The children fight over the feather duster, and Sam uses a whole tin of furniture polish.
In the afternoon, there is stuff in the art gallery, which is excellent. They make stencil pictures and paint pebbles, and then we look at the art gallery and read books in the library while the paint dries. Oldham Art Gallery has some excellent exhibitions, and is quite user-friendly, even if you have children and know nothing. The gallery based on ‘flowers’ has a little bit with dressing up and you can draw your own picture. There is another gallery, where you are actually allowed to pick things up, and another gallery with work done by local schools, very good. And we left out the other gallery; maybe we’ll see it next time.
Then we go to the cafe in Sainsbury’s, and do some shopping (from a list), because we have decided to make blueberry ice cream for pudding. It is delicious.
Well, we’d better get cracking. First there are all the things I want to do in the holidays, which I decide the best way is to start small, and do each thing in little bits.
I want to get some housework done, so I promote ‘changing the bedding’ as ‘a pillow fight’. I need some things measured; Sam can measure, Hannah can write down.
Then to the post office for some jiffy bags and some exercise books, which Sam is going to use one to make a project on the cello for part of a cub interest badge.
There is Sam’s left-over homework (today, a bible story about saying Thank you, so I get Sam to tell the story of the ten lepers, of which one came back, which he did in a class assembly), Hannah’s viola lesson (I am not at all sure that the shoulder rest isn’t too big for her), Sam’s cello.
The good thing is that the children are old enough to do lots of playing by themselves; but we still have to do ‘other stuff’, and I still have to take them places. Today, we go to the park, where they play, and I sit in the grass doing nothing. Funnily enough, I find this boring. Perhaps I should be more organised and look out my crochet. Home for coffee, dinner and a little bit of editing.
But since it’s Monday, the first day proper. I had advised my children that a lie-in was in order, but still somehow ended up getting up at the normal time.
Since we have things to buy in Manchester, we arrange to go and meet Daddy. Previously, we have had lunch with him, but he says he is busy, so we arrange that we will meet him after work for dinner instead. Which means that I can do all those things in the village that I haven’t got round to yet, in the morning.
Hang washing out, sort breakfast., dishwasher
Mass, make dentists appointments (for October), take Daddy’s book to library, fetch the library book he’s ordered, buy flowers (treat), get prescription from pharmacist (mouth wash, from the dentist), take round money for Lees Community Association.
Playing, television, lunch, dishwasher, bins, make a start on his unfinished EPR book (we have to find lots of bible stories, today a bible story about helping someone in need; we find Jesus heals a blind man).
Bus to Manchester, find dance shop for dance shoes, but it’s closed, Forsyth for Hannah’s shoulder rest, two more music stands (for Spode), viola tutor for Hannah, recorder music for me, bookshop (buy birthday present for Hannah’s party on Sunday), fetch Daddy, tea at Chinese buffet.
Home, tired, bring washing in, shoo children to bed.
A Sunday; well, I can do Sundays. Day of rest, officially.
Mass, 9:30. Sam is being tired from yesterday, John plays his bass guitar.
Then there is the Lees Village Fair in the afternoon. Lots of queuing; inflatable slide, bran tub, throw the balls in the crocodile (Hannah got one in!), the climbing wall (Sam didn’t like it, Hannah didn’t really get the hang of it, but did like it), cheerleading, ice cream, scarecrows (there was a competition, but we just looked at them).
Yet another summer holidays. This year it is 6 weeks and a weekend and a day. So that’s 45 days, or if you don’t count weekends, 31 days, or if you also ignore the weekdays that we will be at music week (booked holiday), 26 days.
Day 1, Saturday.
Saturday is a Daddy-daycare day for me lots of the times, and today is no exception. I have to finish editing an extract of 30 Millennia of Sculpture and tackle some more of the iMRCS Revision Guide: Trunk and Thorax. In the evening, I have a gig, a little affair, but I am playing in a string ensemble, and also a recorder solo. I am nervous, but it goes well.
Meanwhile, Hannah is still having dancing in the summer holidays, so that is something.
I have discovered that there is free golf coaching for children at the golf club. Sam is keen, so I checked it out. Sam went last week but it was raining, so they lent him a club. He goes today, and likes it. Hannah says that she will want to try it next week.
Sam is still up when I get back from the gig; it is the proms on the telly, and we let him watch it.
possibly tartar sauce. maybe sauce tartare
Anyway, like mayonnaise from scratch, with mustard, olive oil and white wine vinegar, and with finely chopped gherkins, capers and parsley in. It said ‘some’, so I don’t know if it was the right amount.
This is meant to go with fish, but usually if we’re cooking fish, we don’t have time to make tartar sauce from scratch, and if we have time to make the sauce, we’re not having fish. So I gave up, made it today and we had it with John’s dinner of sausages, potatoes, carrots and sweetcorn. It tastes okay, is piquant, and would have gone better with fish. But I expect it makes a nice potato salad, since my potato salad usually has mayo and gherkins, so is halfway there anyway.